The holidays are usually the time of year that people become more depressed than any other time of year. I used to be a depressed person when Christmas rolled around and even today I find I have to work hard to overcome the spirit of grief on Christmas day.
There are many reasons people get depressed for the holidays: being single, grieving loved ones who have transitioned, not having money to purchase gifts, not having a family of their own, dealing with family they don't like or want to deal with at all, and some are clinically diagnosed as depressed.
For me, it was hard to come out of the "funk" of depression. I struggled every time and sometimes it took weeks for me to feel like my normal self after the holidays were over. It often felt like I was having out-of-body experiences where my happy self was looking down on my sad self hoping I would pull through and feel good again. My happy self wanted me to pull through, but the depressed self wanted to stay and wallow in self-pity.
Over the years, God brought me out of depression but it took time and work. It didn't happen overnight and like I said, even today something about Christmas day brings a spirit of grief that I work to overcome every year.
I've had depressed moments, but I've never lived with depression on a daily basis for years of my life. So I can't even begin to imagine how that may feel. I do, however, want to offer tips that have helped me over the years to overcome depression and allowed me to stay positive and upbeat when the spirit of depression tried to overtake me.
1. Give your emotions to God. God is the ultimate Healer. As a matter of fact, you are already healed. According to 1 Peter 2:24 NLT we know, "He personally carried our sins in his body on the cross so that we can be dead to sin and live for what is right. By his wounds, you are healed." So we need to access that healing by faith and turning to God and allowing Him to heal us emotionally. That means, telling God how you feel and allowing Him to go deeper within you to the source of your depression to deal with the root of it. (Here are a few Scriptures on healing - James 5:16; Revelation 21:4; Jeremiah 17:14; Psalm 147:3; Psalm 30:2)
In addition to healing, we also need the peace of God that passes all understanding. Emotional peace is yours! Say that aloud to yourself, "Emotional peace is mine!" Jesus said in John 14:27 NLT, "I am leaving you with a gift--peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don't be troubled or afraid." Ask God to give you His peace when you feel depression coming on. (Here are a few Scriptures on peace - Psalm 29:11; Psalm 34:14; Isaiah 26:12; John 16:33; 2 Thessalonians 3:16)
2. Don't listen to depressing music. This was key for me during Christmas years ago. I would listen to the Boyz II Men Christmas CD over and over again and cry my eyes out because I was single, sad, and lonely. Not only that but some Christmas music would remind me of my mother and other loved ones I lost. I simply had to stop listening to music that made me feel sad and lonely. -- And let me say, not all Christmas music makes me feel that way. Just specific ones that I no longer listen to.
3. Don't talk to or hang around people who are just as depressed or more depressed than you. Find some upbeat people in your life you can hang out with or chat on the phone with who will make you laugh and feel good. You need people in your life who won't let you wallow on depression but will pull you out of it.
4. Talk it out. Don't harbor feelings of sadness, disappointment, or depression in your heart. Talk it out with someone. You can do this through prayer (talking to God) or talking with a counselor, a therapist, a trusted friend, clergy, or even writing in a journal. The key to talking it out is to be open and honest about how you feel. Don't try to sugarcoat it and don't judge your feelings. Just express them so they won't fester inside you and cause you to become more depressed or take action you'll later regret.
5. Have fun. Make plans to go out and have fun. Don't sit in the house alone feeling sad and depressed. Do something you love. Go dancing, go to a comedy club, hang out with friends... INjoy yourself. In other words, put joy in your heart.
6. Remember happier times. This helps me when I'm thinking of my loved ones who have transitioned to eternity. I find that when I begin to miss them and feel grief try to overtake me, I remember happy times I had with my loved ones and I laugh and feel good about the wonderful times we had together as opposed to missing them to the point of depression. -- Just to be clear, there is nothing wrong with missing your loved one. Only when missing them turns into deep grief and depression to the point that it paralyzes you emotionally is when you need to get help or pull out of it.
7. Get professional help. Some depression can't be "snapped out of" and if this is the case for you, get professional help. See a professional to get the necessary medication or take the necessary steps to help pull you out of depression. You can still exercise your faith while taking medication.
8. Remember the real reason for celebrating Christmas. Although we don't know the actual day Jesus was born, we take time to celebrate His birth. Christmas has become so commercialized and it makes people feel that if they can't purchase enough gifts or have the most decorations they aren't good enough, happy enough, rich enough, etc. Christmas should not be defined by temporal things that won't last anyway. The focus should be on our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ who God the Father sent to live and sacrifice His life for us. Had it not been for His birth, life, and sacrifice we would all be lost. So celebrate Jesus!
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